Last week I asked you wonderful people to send me an e-mail including an article which you'd love to have appear on my blog. My inbox was full of so many GREAT and interesting blogs that I had to create a special folder. I had so many different posts, that I couldn't pick ONE like I said I would initially. So instead I decided to pick three very different articles which were sent to me. The WINNERS were @MsThorne_ @LongForLaz & @Nubiancake.
Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who took time out to write something and send it in to me. I really appreciated your efforts. Even the kind words that were said after I replied to those who I didn't pick still made me smile.
Anyway. . here are the blogs I REALLY loved. I hope you all enjoy it :-)
A Turn Back For Poor Souls.
It never happened any other way. Being caught in the moment, in a tense position, doing nothing but awaiting his response. The power one text had to determine if either of us was worth the time, energy or wait anymore. The feeling of everything until now being nothing but a lie. The feeling that everything labeled “real” was on edge of coming to an end.
After 5 months of arguments, tears and stress, I could think of nothing but his passionate kisses and over powering touch. Reluctantly, I could feel his delicate, soft lips melting mine like mountain snow over summer sun. Thoughts of his sex appeal caused me to confuse the difference between reality and fantasy. Thoughts creating a dull ache between my legs, feeling my sex lips opening up. So shamefully damp. My fingers slid up against my ribcage, triggering fireworks in my body to send off. It seemed so surreal, not to mention… perfect.
He was right where I needed him, inside me. A place where the heart could not provide for just anyone nor’ absorb hidden emotion. I was forced to send him a text letting him know my mind, body and soul were not home without him. This was a different type of feeling. My ache had already expanded into a pleasurable, pulsating sensation. Warmth suffusing my lower belly, my clitoris starting to retract as my climax grew near and more exposed. This sexual thirst was not prepared to give into the temptation. I knew I should not have swallowed my pride. He could not give me anything that my minds fulfilled other than shower me by means of sexual, mind –blowing goods that left his imprint on me. He had me wrapped around his finger although I repeatedly tried to convince myself that what we had was yet to be “Love,” Just desirable “tricks” managing to satisfy both bodies combined. Descending ring of Tamar Braxton – The one echoed my surroundings notifying me of his response. “I’m still here and I’m Coming.” It read, interrupting my hormones reminding me the cause of my attachment. This hold he had over me, sent me back to square one. This was due to become nothing but fun, games and “no strings attached” which I would still get tied up in. My acquaintances called it the “Rollercoaster” though this battle had no real name. I could do nothing more than prepare myself for the ride. It was officially out of my hands. I will not kid myself, I was ecstatic for what he was due to surprise me with this time. A tiny cry of disappointment as it could not take place at this current time. “Canes, Handcuffs, Spanking?” These thoughts just intoxicating my thoughts consistently.
We were constantly fighting this endless war though we had an undying love. Suppose we were the ones that never got away. Inseparable. His succulent flesh and deep creation was my addiction nonetheless, never caught me off guard. Knowing what was due to take place made it more unbearable to escape simply because I couldn’t get enough. It was time.
No change of why I kept going back.
His compassion and endurance. His enticing, seductive smile that instantly drenched my panties and inner thighs. His grip overall. Young black ambitious guy, striving towards his dreams moreover forever taking risks. His dark, intense eyes that could examine further than what could be seen. His exhilarating touch that scorched my skin. His low, penetrating voice that sent electrifying shivers down my spine. Just reminiscing about such perfection, intensified my feeling. The entrance to my vagina instinctively tightening, sending increased pressure of sharp pleasure through my lower body. I knew who and what I wanted and “Mr. Right” ticked all those boxes. He was the definition of my dream man. Literate, motivated, the type to help others and incredibly captivating in bed. All inequalities making him irresistible with “Belongs to me” permanently marked over him.
Forever busy, communication and his pride were the most concerning and problematic. Having to feel like every little thing had to prosper into an argument was his deepest flaw. Giving his 24 hours to his boys and feeling like it was acceptable to not check on me every other day also added to the list. He continued to doubt he was the man for me when all I needed was right in front of me, his mirror reflection. There were times I found myself in tears apologizing for his mistakes more than he probably took time to visit, me.
I don’t know what hidden agenda attracted me to this male but I couldn’t. get. enough.
He was everything I personally shouldn’t have been drawn to as my feelings were always disregarded. What I truly needed, he could not provide and no matter how many times I told myself that that, I always found myself skin to skin with him. Harsh breaths and sweat sliding down my breasts while fulfilling his needs with sore back scratches as well as vicious moans.
He would pull down my panties and close his mouth around my vulva, gently open me up allowing his tongue to caress me. Throbbing sex. The pleasure grew, throwing my head back as delicious sensations washed over me. Shaking as a wonderful climax rippled through me. Despite all doubts and flaws, he was whom my heart desired. Everyday, I had visions that put aside all our drama, the “rollercoaster” would finally end and we could eventually tie the knot on a platform, building our empire. Today wasn’t that day.
Yesterday, I sent a duplicate text to see if chances were high of him astounding me or quickening my heart rate. Still, the same anticipatory reaction. It was still and always had been him who my heart longed for.
Deep desires and caskets of love wrapped so preciously to protect us from any negativity willing to strike. At last, I felt like the belt to this rollercoaster had unraveled. The warmth filled me knowing the feeling of a fresh start. I watched the glistens in his eye, blinking passionately. The struggle of searching for his heart had ended. It was there pounding in front of my eyes. The beauty of holding on to what is yours. The rollercoaster had become nothing but empty seats and poor hearts. And I wasn’t turning back.
Has your ride finished or is this rollercoaster still occurring?
Be Who You Want To See.By
Why do friendships have to be so political? One has to operate a certain way so that it doesn’t displease the other. Is that being fake? Or is that being friendly? I see many friendships founded on a “you scratch my back and I’ll scratch your back” basis, rather than just enjoying each other’s’ presence, happiness, trust and fun!
You can’t like someone just because of what they can offer you! A friendship is just like a relationship, where its “what do you bring to the table.” Is your presence enjoyable? Are you respectful and a blessing to me? Is everything we do mutual? It’s not about “Joe Bloggs gives me this, therefore I can only give her/him this much, otherwise it would not equate to what he gave me” I believe with genuine friendships you should receive what you put in; if you show no love, no compassion and no respect in a friendship then don’t expect that to come back to you because you don’t deserve it! If you’re giving someone all of those qualities and they are not adding it back into your life, you my friend need to remove them from yours.
What we need to do is appreciate the friends around us, filter out who is genuine and who is out to just use others. I won’t lie and say this is an easy task to know who is really there for you and who isn’t as that is a job in itself. However guide your heart, walk with common sense and wisdom. Know what people’s motives are and be very mindful of the way they act. One way I do this is by seeing and hearing how they talk about others; old friends, people they hate and others in passing. You can tell a lot about that because you then get an idea how they talk about you to others.
I believe that friends are the family members we choose, so don’t let just anyone in your circle, aura or surroundings so they can suck out the fire and spirit within you. Have people around you who help you grow so that you can be able to reciprocate that and more back. When you’re down or going through a difficult situation you need someone who is there on the other end of the phone or table to help you out. Especially those who know there’s a problem without you even speaking. But also be that person as well to someone or a selective few people. In today’s society people want to be selfish (let’s be honest, sometimes you just have to be) however, choose the right people to be selfish to, not everyone has to be treated like an unknown in your life when they deserve a better footing. There is a time and a place for everything.
All in all, be open to knowing people, it’s not good for the heart and soul to be so cut off from people because the people you trusted destroyed your trust. But be mindful and protective of your heart because, as simple as it may sound, it is your heart and that is sacred. Be the reflection of a true genuine friend, then you’ll see people who are true and genuine flocking to you.
Protect Your Heart
‘I played the game in a way in which I could not get hurt... I was selfish yes in the same breath I can't take risks with my heart...'
This may not be Socrates or taken from an established journal article but when I read this tweet it, it spoke volumes to me.
I've realised that actually I've taken a lot of risks with my heart. For the benefit of others...because I felt it's important to give people a chance and not live by bad past experiences. But the truth is past experiences *should* shape us. They should change us. We're all very aware about how history repeats itself. Dating, having sexual relationships with people, going out with someone...all of it includes risks. Every single one of them. Before you decide you want to give someone a chance this is just something you should always have instilled in your mind. Simply because if things go wrong and you sincerely never acknowledged that possibility, it can break you in ways you never believed were possible.
Don't ever let anyone make you feel bad for guarding your heart, not friends, family or that blooming love interest. No one. At the end of the day, if a prospect love interest doesn't understand your reasoning then they don't deserve your time. Why try and make things work with someone who doesn't understand you...think about it in that way.
Even this 90 day rule you people harp on about...it was never that deep. Do it when you feel like it, it's entirely up to you. If you want to wait it out, go ahead. Why take risks because you think a guy will go get it elsewhere...surely if you think that you're wasting time on the wrong person? You cannot live to impress the opposite sex because you will never be happy. Even men, why rush into it? Where does it say you must dive in as soon as possible? Even if a girl looks like she's on it there's actually no need. It can be negative for men too. I've been in love once. It wasn't planned, in fact a couple weeks before we started talking I had just ended things with someone else. I was really just ready to take on the world. I had structure, I had a plan, I was motivated to find peace and happiness in the things I do.
When we met I was at a good place, mentally. I was sceptical about him, I didn't want to get hurt. I used to pray about him all the time. I prayed that his experiences in his life wouldn't lead him to hurting me...What I find strange is how people view falling in love. Like it's trap and someone just comes and steals your heart...to me it's not. I don't believe in 'the one' or soul mates and that crap. For me it was about opening myself up, allowing myself to believe in us. Fully, with no fear. I had no fear, not even 1%. No doubts, I really believed that no matter what, we'd always be there for each other. He made me promise him many times that I'd never leave him and when I did I always meant it. And without details...well he just broke up with me. After a very silly argument...
Was the worst period of my life, for various reasons. You never expect people you think that care about you to leave you in your time of need. Honestly, the only thing that still breaks my heart to this day is how much I allowed it to hurt me. It was like being choked 24/7, I'd wake up in the middle of the night and involuntarily cry and struggle to stop. If you've ever experienced emotional turmoil you'll know that it physically causes you pain as well and sometimes when I was lying down and not crying I'd tune in and focus on the pain. Try and feel all of it so that one day I could look back and know to never risk my heart again for anyone...
Anyone that knows me, knows that I'm a positive person. I always try and give situations and people the benefit of doubt. And I do believe in taking chances. Sometimes you just have to otherwise you end up living a very sterile life. All I'm saying is you should always be prepared for what life could throw at you. And I don't just mean that in a negative way, if life throws you someone wonderful, you should also be prepared to just be happy...
Everything takes time. If you've just met someone great...be patient and wait for what the person has to show. If you're going through a rough patch with someone you care about, give time for things to get better. That rush and desperate need for things to 'get back to how they used to be' will cause you more pain than happiness. Not to mention leave you in a pool of over thinking. And if you've lost someone you care about give time to mend yourself. You don't have to rush that either because the worst thing is pretending that you're over it and then those feelings creeping up on you when you least expect it. No matter how long it takes, just makes sure when you're done, you're really done.